AFTER YOU SAY HELLO

        By Margaret Kent

        Your initial hello and conversation with a man should take ten to fifteen minutes. Ask him about him self. If he has recently arrived in your city, for instance, you could use questions such as these:

         > What brought you in this city?
         > What have you enjoyed the most about being here?
         > How different is this city from where you come from?
         > How long do you plan to live here?
         > Has it been easy to make new friends?
         > What interesting place have you found in this city?
         > How are you spending your free time?
         > How often do you visit home?
         > How often do friend visit from home?
         > How does this city differ from what you expected?

        Ask questions that require an explanation rather than a one word answer. Make it easy for the man to tell you about him self - because in this first conversation, he is likely to tell you how unique or different he think he is from other men. He will probably disclose ten to twenty facts about himself in this brief conversation, facts you must try to remember if you are interested in him.

        Look for any fact or combination of facts that you feel makes him different from other men. If you find him interesting, tell him so, and tell him why. Then indicate how he can see you again. Say, "I usually have lunch here on Tuesdays and Fridays. Maybe we can talk again next Friday." If you don't find him interesting, say good-bye. You need to expand your horizons and meet as many men as you can, but you also need to begin the wedding-out process as soon as possible.